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  • Project Declutter

    As mentioned in the last post, I plan to Declutter. Declutter my house, thoughts, and my projects (predominantly work projects). Breaking news: Project Declutter is a new project. Ironic rhymes with moronic. Well, here we go – starting with Goals for each.

    Inspired by a BBC article Why now is time to declutter and four ways to get started

    Declutter house – clothes, old/forgotten toys, kitchen cupboards, random stuff, garden. (Hint: this is already getting stressful). Start small as the BBC advises so I will start with my own clothes. Keep my favourites and clothes I feel good and comfortable in, donate the rest. I can’t be bothered with selling stuff on Vinted.

    Declutter thoughts – This year, I’ve read self-help books focusing on how to ace your mornings. I read The 5am Club and The Miracle Morning – both promoting prescriptive lifestyle changes for the first hour of your day. The 5 am Club has 20/20/20 (exercise, reading, reflection – 20 minutes each) and The Miracle Morning has SAVERS (silence, affirmations, visualisation, exercise, reading, scribing – 10 minutes each). I have decided that I am not ready to religiously subscribe to either prescription. (Also, there needs to be The Miracle Morning for Mums). But I get that exercise, stillness, reflection, planning are important early in the day.

    Rise and Shine

    I normally am the first person to wake up at home – around 5 am. I do enjoy the silence in the house and some quiet me time. Xavier is my morning buddy as he wakes up at 530 am without fail. So this is our time together which I really value. Chaos (the official start of the day) starts when breakfast is a go.

    At the beginning of September, towards the tail end of the BBC Proms, I started yet another project – Project Classical Music. The question being… ‘What would happen if I just listened to classical music for a year?’ And aiming to then go to the BBC Proms in 2026. Keeping it simple, I will only listen to BBC 3 in the car. So far, I’ve learnt about Benjamin Britten’s Midsummer Nights Dream and Maurice Ravel’s Rapsodie Espagnole, I really want to read Jilly Cooper’s Appasionata, and also, Night on Bald Mountain is pretty wild in the car.

    Where am I going with this? Well, listening to classical music on the way to work and back, despite aiming for a calm mind, it has instead invigorated me (non-caffeinated waker upper). It has helped me reflect and plan my day out. After dropping the kids off, I spend the first full piece that comes on the radio as my Mindfulness piece and just enjoy the music and keep my mind still. The second piece is for planning the day – 2 things, what is the first thing I need to do when I get to work and what I must accomplish that day.

    BBC Radio 3 – Listen. You might become a believer.

    Declutter projects – surely not by starting another project such as Project Declutter or Operation: Pass Physics! Well, I will be moving to Southampton at the beginning of November, starting with Urology. So I am in the process of off-loading my Portsmouth projects to other colleagues and vowed not to start any projects when I get to Southampton until I pass Physics.

    And don’t sign up for any other races. Maybe just go on 3 mile runs for now.

    Simple, right?

  • Big Blows to Contend With

    This year has not been that great with goals and accomplishments. I think that I have gotten really good at believing I can do anything, that I can multi-task. I have all 10 fingers in 10 different desserts. I seriously thought that I have so much energy to burn off. The outcome of this falsely immovable self-belief is sadly, mediocrity.

    Sounds like I’m really hard on myself. I started this blog to document (for myself and for anyone who cares to read) my journey in achieving a goal I have set for myself – running the World Marathon Majors. This is all whilst being a mum of 2 young kids and training to be a Clinical Oncologist.

    I am so focused on getting good at all 3 roles. However, worlds do collide and things do get complicated.

    As a mum, my benchmark is that ‘as long as the kids are healthy, happy, and are doing well in school.’ So far, David and I have achieved that despite full-time jobs (him as a dual-trainee in Intensive Care Medicine and Anaesthetics and me in Clinical Oncology). I do not know how we manage, but somehow we do.

    As a runner, it has not been such a great year, even starting with the Portsmouth Coastal Marathon last December. Followed by the Tokyo Marathon. Then Edinburgh Marathon. All were 5 hour marathons back to back. Complete regression. Now the Great South Run is in 2 weeks and I don’t think I could run it.

    As a Clinical Oncology trainee, I failed my Physics exam for the third time. Taking the FRCR Part 1 for the first time (which entails Cancer Biology and Radiobiology, Pharmacology, Medical Statistics, and Physics), I passed 2 and failed 2. Second attempt, I passed Med Stats and failed Physics. Sitting it the third time, I had thought I nailed it (or at least understand the questions asked), I was dead wrong. Here’s the kicker, I failed by just 1 mark! Just could not hack it. Failing also means I could not progress to the next training level. I’ve got 3 more attempts – I need to pass the next time.

    Failed by 1 mark

    For my Masters in Oncology course, I had also failed the Advanced Radiation essay (Skin Radiotherapy) which I had to re-write and failed again. Then I had to completely write a new one (Lung Radiotherapy), which I finally passed.

    Blow after blow, things eventually have taken a toll. However, instead spending too much time sulking, I just have to sit down a bit, dust off and restrategise. I reflected that I need to declutter… a lot. Declutter my house, my thoughts, my projects, and my grand plans. By trying to make my life as simple as possible – by focusing on being a mum, a trainee, and an amateur runner, I’ve somehow made things more complicated. Another consoling reflection, referring back to the marathon, everybody goes at their own pace. I go at my own pace.

    I don’t want to completely give running up but I need to buckle down on passing the exams. Right now, I do not have the guts or the confidence to sign up for another marathon, not until I pass this exam. I have learnt that training for a marathon and revising for exams do not go well together. Any sane person would say ‘I told you so.’ I had to learn this for myself.

    The things is… the ballot for the Sydney Marathon has just opened (for August 2026). Don’t do it Mon, just don’t (for now).

  • Digging deep at the Edinburgh Marathon

    This marathon was 8 years in the making. This was the first marathon I signed up to in 2017 (to cap finishing Med School) but I never got to go due to passport/visa delays. I ended up running 26.2 miles solo in Long Beach. I raised money for Anthony Nolan.

    This weekend, I managed to get myself to Edinburgh and actually run the damn thing.

    Headlines were 1) Edinburgh is one gorgeous city and race showcased that. 2) Race 1 was the first 18 miles and Race 2 was the brutal last 8 miles. 3) Applied lessons I learned from Tokyo. 4) There were showers at the Finish Line. 5) I thoroughly enjoyed this marathon.

    Edinburgh is one gorgeous city and the race showcased that.

    I was in Edinburgh for a total of 29 hours. Flew in, checked in, ate dinner, woke up, ran, flew out. I wish I had longer time there. The course zigzagged around the big landmarks which were of respectable sizes and presence. We ran through the University, the Royal Mile, saw Edinburgh Castle, the Scottish Parliament. It even looped around Arthur’s Seat. This was also all downhill (5 miles of downhill) towards the coast. Unfortunately, I did not capture any of this as I consciously chose to leave my phone in my bag.

    Race 1 was the first 18 miles and Race 2 was the brutal last 8 miles.

    There were 2 very distinct races during this marathon. The first being from the start line in Edinburgh all the way going east along the coast until 18 miles. There was the 5 mile downhill then along the coast, the strong wind practically pushed me all the way to 18 miles. Of note, the weather report predicted a windy day with gusts of up to 40 miles per hour. And it was exactly just that.

    Nothing ever beats coastal running. It is how I run in Southsea and it was also how I ran in Long Beach. However, if the wind is pushing you one way (‘May the wind be forever at your back’), this only means that you are going to face it head on at the switchback.

    The switchback was at Gosford House. The last 8 miles of any marathon is already the crappiest part of the run but the wind decided to spice it up a bit more. Before turning back on to the road, the heavens opened up and let down one big bucket of rain (just for kicks). Then all the way to the finish was a battle against the 40 mph gusts of wind. You couldn’t fall forward even if you tried to. To the right of us, the water was incredibly choppy.

    Starting off from Edinburgh, it was about 12 C and the sun was already out and up above at 10 am. By the time we got to the coast, I felt I was overdressed for the occasion – wearing a long-sleeve top. But at the coast, we then experienced all 4 seasons – which included HALE! Someone up there just started chucking ice cubes at us! Then periodically, a loaded cloud would start heading towards us, blown by the 40 mph winds, perfectly crossing our path and unleashing a bucket more. I actually enjoyed these random downpours as it cooled me down and kept me going. This was so unlike Tokyo where it was 20 C the WHOLE race. This also wasn’t like last year’s Edinburgh Marathon, where it poured the WHOLE race. There was a good balance in the weather – apart from the wind. My last 8 miles were consistently over 12 min/mile.

    Applied lessons I learned from Tokyo.

    First, I got to the Start area very early, right when it opened. I was at the Pink Pen. This allowed me to take my time, queued up for the loo then queued up again straight after. Then stood there with a foil blanket calmly (not panicking) until it was our time to go.

    For this race, I cut back a whole lot. At Tokyo and some races I’ve before, I carried with me so many things that in the end, were weighing me down and distracting me.

    So I didn’t wear my belt bag and didn’t bring water. I stuffed my trail shorts with gels and brought just those and relied on all the aid stations. I also didn’t bring my phone (left it in my bag at drop off), hence no race photos. I also didn’t bring any headphones as I found that I get more distracted fiddling with these especially when they lose connection. Doing all of this was actually quite liberating and allowed me to focus on me and my run.

    This was the only photo I have, before turning it off and handing it in with my baggage.

    Also, one really important lesson from Tokyo was studying the course to eliminate surprises. I did just that. Days before, I just kept reviewing the course map and watched videos from people who have run it before. I studied the elevations, and I googled the landmarks in Edinburgh. I spent zero time worrying about where the switchback was as I knew it would be at Gosford House around 18 miles. I knew that an aid station was coming and where caffeine gels were.

    Downhill for 5 miles then a flatish undulating 21 miles on the coast.

    There were showers at the Finish Line.

    Although the last few miles were a struggle as expected and I kept looking at my watch calculating if I could get 4:40. I was on track at Gosford House at 3:12 around 18 miles and had I kept going at 10 min/mile, I would have done it. But the wind had other plans for me, I immediately started running 12 min/mile turning out of Gosford House. There was more rain as well. My Garmin and the mile markers were also out of sync. I would complete a mile but the mile markers would be 0.3 miles ahead.

    During the last mile and a half, the crowd thickened on both sides of the road. The path narrowed as they kept yelling and encouraging all the runners that we are not far. You can see Finishers with their medals supporting all of us who have not tasted glory just yet.

    As with many marathons, the Finish Line is never as close as you think. There was a quick left turn and another left, all lined with supporters, and the last .2 mile was laid out in white all the way to the Finish Line. I actually sprinted and my Garmin says I ran that bit at 7:16 min/mile! Where the hell did that come from?!

    I didn’t spend much time at the Finisher’s Village as I had a plane to catch. So I grabbed my bag and headed towards the showers. Yes, the SHOWERS! The Finish was at a field of a primary school and they had a gym with several changing rooms with showers. And HOT water! It felt sooo good. This shower also revealed that I had zero chaffing (I spread deodorant all over my chafe-prone areas). It was so nice to be fresh again before the flight back.

    I thoroughly enjoyed this marathon.

    At the Start Line, I stood next to a girl who had written on her hard “Keep Digging Deep.” And when we all got to the coast, everyone kept yelling “Dig Deep!” And dig deep I did.

    This is now my 10th marathon and I have come full circle from when I first signed up and trained for one. I keep thinking about why I love doing this and I feel pure joy in the challenge. It is not just the run itself but also the months of preparation (which I could never get right due to home/work commitments), the thoughts/reflections throughout the run, the solitude despite being surrounded by masses, the last push to the finish, and of course, a nice heavy medal to solidify the intangible challenge I have just gone through.

    So despite the weather and not running for 2 weeks due to a shin splint, I actually really enjoyed this race. It was a gorgeous tour of the city and you can’t really beat coastal running (and the elements that come with it). It wasn’t as flat as promised but the crowd that lined the route were amazing throughout! There were several people playing the bagpipes!

    I finished at 5:04:30. And I am actually very happy with how the run went, all things considered. I was close to breaking my 5 hour streak (back to back to back). Next time Mon.

    8 years in the making!
    Digging Deep.

    I have also promised myself not to sign up to any marathons until I pass my Physics exam in September. Now, we’re off to Slovenia for a nice family holiday at Lake Bohinj.

  • Another pre-marathon endurance test

    Another pre-marathon endurance test

    There are periods in my life where I find myself in a different kind of race. The life/work relay. It often happens around the lead up to a marathon. This time, the 2 weeks before the Edinburgh Marathon were hectic as hell.

    The beginning of May marked the end of being a Lung Registrar and the start of being the triple threat of being a Brain, Skin, and Melanoma Registrar. All fun to learn about as a Clinical Oncology trainee. BUT the week of the 12th of May may have been one of the most challenging weeks at work.

    Monday – having all the day planned out, with childminder picking kids up from school as I will finish late from Melanoma clinic, got a message that our childminder has gastroenteritis. Panic, 2 hours before clinic starts. I had already told the school of the arrangement. Scrambled to message one of the other parents to pick the kids up. Got lucky and grateful to have them. David picked them up. Simultaneously, also found out that I was working the evening shift! And foolishly agreed to swapping an evening shift with a colleague for the following evening!

    Tuesday – I didn’t go to Skin clinic as we had all day Specialty Registrar training on Teenage and Young Adult cancers and communication. Good teaching day and we get a nice free lunch. Then had to rush back to the hospital for the back to back evening shift.

    Wednesday – I am the Emergency Radiotherapy Registrar and out of nowhere, I had to deal with 9 (NINE) referrals! Thankfully, only 1 needed urgent radiotherapy that morning – all the others, I managed to delegate/someone had already started planning. Whew!

    In the afternoon, at the Neuro-Oncology clinic, my first new patient encounter. I will remember this as one of my best ones. Although, the patient and her husband already know that she has incurable brain cancer, we have to work hard at gaining their trust that we will be with them throughout the treatment (chemoradiotherapy) aiming to push back the inevitable for as long as we possibly can. It was one of the most rewarding consultations as both the patient and her husband unexpectedly gave the most detailed feedback on how well it went (given she has terminal brain cancer). So that was good.

    Thursday – although this was admin day, I spent the whole day planning for the next day – the Acute Oncology Teaching Day. I was on Emergency Radiotherapy duty again and dealt with another referral (at least it wasn’t 9).

    Friday – the 4th Acute Oncology Teaching Day. This is also one of my favourites days. This is my baby. Twice a year, I set up a free teaching day with 8 lectures of varying Oncology issues to doctors, nurses, PAs, GPs, GP trainees and other healthcare professionals within the Wessex Deanery, who are interested in learning more about Oncology. And what a joy and privilege it is! We received great feedback from everyone. Yet again, hectic but a really good day.

    Acute Oncology Teaching Day

    Saturday and Sunday – Weekend On-Call, another 2 long days. To be clear, I had 4 (FOUR) long days this week! Luckily the weekend on-call was calm and there were no sickies or deaths in the ward.

    As it is getting warmer and lighter in Southsea, I also got to take the kids out to the beach after work/school.

    This is always special.

    In the 2 weeks leading up to the Edinburgh, I managed a 14 mile run and a 3 mile run. Along with the madness at work, I am also nursing a shin splint. So although my legs are well rested, I hope they still have some strength left for tomorrow – the Edinburgh Marathon!

    Sooo excited!

  • May Start-Up (May madness)

    2 weeks to go til Edinburgh. It is around this time that I think about how challenging it is to train for a marathon whilst ongoing training for a job and ensuring that all these things do not negatively affect the kids’ development.

    Training programme: when can I squeeze in a run?

    Until now, I have yet to establish a stable running schedule. I function on a ‘when can I squeeze in a run?’ basis. As an Oncology trainee, my working hours are predictable (M-F 830-1700 with occasional evening or weekend On-Call). David, who works in Intensive Care Medicine, has a more erratic schedule – day, long day, nights, and weekend on-call. Additionally, he has to drive about 40 mins to Southampton and back, which means very early starts and sometimes getting home late when on long days.

    At the beginning of each month, I set up our calendar and this month, this is what it looks like…

    Colour-coded May madness

    First the colours

    • Green – David
    • Blue – Me
    • Coral Pink – Maya
    • Brown – Xavier
    • Orange – both kids
    • Teal – whole fam
    • Red – conflict/important

    Second, the list of activities

    For the kids – breakfast club, afterschool club (and our initials for whoever is taking/picking them up). Then there’s Footy and Swimming. There are a couple of days when our childminder will pick the kids up from afterschool club, all other days either me or David.

    For David – day, long day, nights

    For Me – Registrar of the Week (one week On-Call), which type of clinic (melanoma, skin, or neuro-onc), weekend on-call, Institute of Cancer Research (MSc course). Of course there is a one day trip to Edinburgh (for a fun run).

    Now imagine superimposing a marathon schedule on top of this? Mostly 4 runs a week, including 1 long run over the weekend. The extra layer when training for a marathon is that I need to make sure it doesn’t interfere too much with family life – which means, the most optimal time to run is very early mornings when everyone is still asleep. I can only dream of a world or a time when I can really follow a marathon training plan to a tee. So for now, I’m on a ‘when can I squeeze in a run’ marathon plan.

    Don’t stop and think too much, just keep going.

    I’ve been built to just keep going. David and I just keep going. With the kids and no family close by, we just have to. With our full-time jobs (~50 hours/week), we chug along. It is non-stop.

    However, it is those little moments when I set the monthly schedule when I get to stop and see first hand how mad it is and ask how is it possible that we are standing upright?!

    Great comfort…

    Despite all that, there is comfort in knowing that the kids are healthy and thriving well in school. Last month, on our Wedding Anniversary, they came home very excited and eager to show us that they were both Devonshire Diamonds on the same day at school. So actually, we may be okay.

    Devonshire Diamonds

    I cannot wait for the end of the month – trip to Bohinj, Slovenia!

  • End of April recap and onwards to Edinburgh

    March and April have both been a lull and busy at the same time. That does not make any sense at all.

    I started March on a high by reaching another star in this journey. Not the time I wanted but I’ve reflected on that already. After running a marathon, I went into a mini slump mostly reflecting on my goals and also thinking which one to run next. There are sooo many like Midnight Sun or Medoc or even the Southampton. BUT. I also promised myself not to sign up for another one until I actually pass my exam. (However, I have put my name in on the ballot for Sydney 2025 and London 2026. Yikes!) Let’s face it… what was I doing training for a marathon and revising for an exam?!Both high stakes and was bound to be suboptimally achieved in the way I had gone about it. But these are the lessons I learn for myself.

    It has also been busy because I have now tried to look after all the things I have neglected these past few months. Things like keeping Oncology portfolio up to date, organising the next Acute Oncology Teaching Day, looking after my orchids, and even just getting the house back in order.

    Well-being exercise: orchid care

    I further thought about running goals and like everyone else, I just would like to be able to run better. So this month I have been trying harder. I feel like I have gone back to basics trying to run shorter faster miles. I think I have improved compared with the beginning of the year. However, my 2025 goal of running 100 miles a month has started to dwindle. I managed to accomplish it for January and February but I was waking up at 5 am. Somehow, I think that I have hit a training slump. I am managing to run 13 miles on the weekends but not so much during the week.

    One thing that is also making me nervous is a small niggle that I am feeling on my left shin. It disappears once I start running but it becomes more prominent right after a run and the days to come. I am very conscious about it and letting it rest rather than overusing it that I won’t be able to run Edinburgh.

    Edinburgh. 4 weeks to go. I need 3 more long runs and a good taper. It will also be the first time I am running with the doped up Asics Nimbus. The shoes have definitely helped with speed but I also think it is the reason for my niggly left shin. We shall see.

  • Re-framing Failure

    It is easy to make this blog just all about showcasing successes and good days. It is harder to highlight failure and struggles. However, failure and struggles are part and parcel with each challenge I go through so here we go…

    I have a career where being ambitious, motivated, and successful are core principles in order to be part of the club. No one became a doctor by chance. All doctors have varying stories of achieving high levels of success, maybe even all the way back from childhood. It is a career driven by a cutthroat cycle of learning, studying, and being examined. There are many different forms of assessments in order to progress – exams (written, oral, practical), projects, yearly reviews, portfolio-building, job interviews, training and competencies to perform procedures. Every single doctor (whether they care to admit or not) is undeniably, an overachiever. After all, you are responsible for other people’s lives and health. You need to always be on top of your game.

    That is a lot of pressure, don’t you think? But we are undoubtedly used to the pressure, we have adapted. Most of us can work under immense pressure. However, we are also all prone to burn out, especially if we don’t have built-in coping mechanisms (mine being running).

    Although we are very much trained to embrace success, we are also the absolute worst when dealing with failure. We don’t like to fail. Not being good enough is not a good feeling. Underperformance is a hard punch to the gut. And for me, I have had a fair share of blows recently. I am fully aware that I am overstretched, overwhelmed, and on the brink of burn-out. I am also aware that being overstretched and overwhelmed is self-inflicted and have most likely led to these results.

    Back in April 2023, I had the best week ever. This week is the complete opposite…

    • Poor marathon result
    • Failed the Physics essay and now have to re-do Physics module of the MSc course
    • Failed the Physics module of the FRCR Part 1 (second attempt)
    • Didn’t get into the NYC Marathon 2025.
    Passed 1, Failed 1

    I did pass the Medical Statistics (woohoo!). I already passed Cancer Biology and Radiobiology and Clinical Pharmacology back in September, when I took all 4 modules (passed 2, failed 2).

    If I was new to the Failing Game then I would be thinking that I should quit Medicine now. However, this is not the first time I’ve failed. Although it still hurts the ego a bit, I see these now in a different light. One, well I just have to get better at this. Two, learning the material will give me more confidence when I am looking after my patients. Three, learning Physics is never a bad thing – it is central in giving Radiotherapy.

    There is also the feeling of getting left behind by your peers. Everyone around you is progressing with some passing exams the first time around. When I was in the first month in the first year of being a doctor, my Educational Supervisor in General Surgery told me that I was falling behind my peers (Hello… it’s the first month!). I would like to believe that he said that so I can step up my game and be the best that I can be. It still hurt when he said it though.

    In times like these, I always think about the marathon. Everyone runs at their own pace, some will be faster than me, some will be slower than me. And not that I’m anywhere like Paula Radcliffe but she inspires many women, myself included. At Tokyo (last week), she came back to run the marathon after retiring at 40, she is now 51 and ran under 3 hours. She then said and I’d like to think she directed this at me…

    “I really take my hat off to everyone who juggles the training with a career, and family life around that, because it’s a different way – but it makes the achievement when you cross that finish line a little bit sweeter.”

    I’ll cross the Finish Line with these exams one day. And it will be one sweet day.

    ,

  • TOK. My Fourth Star: Tokyo

    TOK. My Fourth Star: Tokyo

    Wow. Just Wow.

    There is nothing but mixed emotions for this one, making it more special than the others. Yes, I finished the long-awaited Tokyo Marathon but it wasn’t in the condition I hoped it would be. And here’s how it started going all wrong. Also, I had zero sleep due to jetlag and nerves.

    1. It was too hot!

    For the past week, I have been intensely looking at the weather app… it was predicting 18 deg Celcius on race day. I was getting worried. I should have started mentally preparing myself for this but I didn’t. At the Start Line (9am), it was a bit cloudy so it wasn’t so bad and there were buildings. However, in the middle of the race, the temperature peaked at 21 deg Celcius! I was not ready for this. I was training in 5 deg Celcius in Portsmouth.

    At the start line, instead of getting mentally prepared, I was busy looking for the last porta-loo so I can go for one last wee, which thankfully I managed to do.

    Lesson: Gotta nail the Mental Game down. Also arrive early for adequate pre-race toileting.

    Still looking fresh but desperate for the toilet.

    2. Ran out of water!

    The other thing was that no water/bottles were allowed to be brought in, they were providing water/sport drinks/nutrition at the Aid Stations every 2km starting at 5km. The problem was that they ran out of water and cups later in the race! Everyone stopped at each station to drink something as it was so hot! So did I.

    I was doing well and was happy with my pace the first 5km, all things considered. Normally, I wouldn’t drink/have a gel until about 15 km in but I was already so parched by 5km so I had to stop.

    Lesson: Couldn’t control the running out of water but need to improve at hydration/nutrition strategy.

    3. Way too many toilet breaks!

    And because I drank so much water, I ended up using the toilet 3 times.

    Lesson: as above.

    4. Run/Walk and The Wall!

    Yang Yang, Paolo and Sohail were all at 21 km (halfway point), I was still okay then. Pace hung around 10:30/mile which I was fine with given the heat but at 30 km, I started to fall apart. I didn’t even stop to say hi to them at 30 km, I just had to keep going.

    People started walking early on.

    I started run-walking at this point. At first, I planned to run 0.9 miles and walk 0.1 miles. But then the sun was directly overhead, the buildings weren’t providing any shade anymore, my legs were heavy as lead. My strategy was not working. I was hitting the wall. I kept stopping because they felt like they were about to cramp. I feared that if I cramped, I would not finish.

    Lesson: Master the Mental Game.

    5. Headphones

    The other thing I did for this race, which I never do was listen to music. In my other big city races, I didn’t use head phones and just enjoyed the crowd and be present in the moment. This time, I periodically got distracted with the music and fiddling with the headphones, putting them back in the case to charge, fiddling with my phone. I brought these along because the songs on my playlist had helped me run faster but again… not in these conditions. By having the headphones, I was just not present.

    Lesson: No more headphones on race day ever.

    6. The longest switchback ever!

    When we got to the last stretch (last 5km), we were on this long road – on one side it said 1 km to go, which was exciting and also started seeing the other runners going the opposite way, which was also reassuring. But the road we were on was so long and the switchback was not in sight. It just kept going and the sun was right in front of you. Eventually, everyone turned right and the switchback was another 1km away. Got there eventually and now we were in the last stretch.

    Last stretch aka switchback from hell

    Lesson: Study the marathon route so no surprises.

    By this point, I thought I might as well do some sight-seeing and take pictures, so took photos of the Tokyo Tower and the Zōjō-ji Temple. My form along with my dignity was completely gone.

    Longest stretch ever
    Tokyo Tower
    Zojo-ji Buddhist Temple

    I Finished!

    This was my 9th marathon – NINTH! One would think that with that many, I would have nailed my routine but I clearly didn’t with this race. For the Portsmouth Marathon this past December, I was not physically ready. This one, I put in the miles the past few months before but I was not mentally ready. It feels like I have been regressing and it is not a good feeling.

    It is during these times when I need to humble myself and acknowledge and really learn from the challenges and of course, still be grateful for the whole experience.

    After a gruelling run/walk, I crossed the Finish Line at 5:23:55. Of course not my best time – in fact, second slowest! But you know what, I did not cramp, I am not injured, I did not drop out and got a pretty cool post-race poncho. I am especially grateful for my friends who came to support me. AND I achieved my fourth star in Tokyo!

    4 down… 3 to go (NYC, Boston, Sydney).

    Next up… Edinburgh in May.

  • TOK. Pre-Marathon.

    Pre-travel stress

    As always, the stress of traveling to a marathon was alive and well. I can’t believe that that was 7 days ago. I had clinic on Monday and the tail that came along with it. I thought I would be able to finish tasks before leaving but I didn’t so thought I would finish in the evening and even the next morning. Then picked up kids from nursery.

    Travel day – though this was going to be relaxed but not really. Still didn’t manage to finish all the letters and tasks. But took the kids to Breakfast Club and said goodbye. Then, I went for a 6 mile run. Initially planned to run 13 miles but time was not on my side as the bus to Heathrow was at 12:55. Got home, showered, packed the last bits. (Also, there were people working to re-do our downstairs bathroom). So it was hectic. Then David drove me to the bus station. Hmmm… I could do letters on the bus or at Heathrow. I didn’t really want to bring my laptop but Alas!

    Chaos ensued when my computer decided to update when it wasn’t connected to the internet. Heathrow internet struggled so for 2 hours I watched a blue circle instead of trying to tidy things up. I also almost bought new shoes whilst this was going. Okay maybe the next airport – Beijing (MUST PRESCRIBE CHEMO!). No luck, the internet struggled again. Maybe when I get to the hotel. So the whole journey didn’t really feel like a holiday yet. I couldn’t get into the right frame of mind as I was still in work mode. Finally internet at the hotel. I spent the first night in Tokyo writing patient letters and prescribing chemotherapy! I finished. Let marathon mode (and the jet lag) begin.

    The Tokyo Marathon Expo

    Finally, I got to meet up with Andrea at the Seiko shop in Ginza, where all the runners names were printed on the shop window.

    Expos are always similar in these big races – claim your bib then go through a maze of sportswear, nutrition, race previews, photo-ops, charity stalls. I found out that I didn’t have a Tokyo Marathon vest, which I needed to buy sometime in December. I also found out it was $90, which probably the reason why I didn’t buy it in the first place. However, I did but a kids size vest and also a hoody – which I was pleased with.

    We then stopped by our charity’s stalls. Andrea’s was WaterAid and mine was KnK. We chatted with the charity workers and they wished us Good Luck!

    Support crew

    I have been so lucky so far that I have really good friends that come to see me run in each of the Majors. This time, Yang-Yang (from Amsterdam and ran the Tokyo Half Marathon in October), Paolo and Sohail (from the Philippines) all came to support me. Another one of our friends, Xyza, happens to be here as well so she will come out and cheer on the day.

    Pre-race running

    I did a couple of short runs around where I was staying – sightseeing whilst running and stopping to take some pictures, mostly around the Imperial Palace.

    I am so lucky to be here and what an opportunity it is! Race day here we go!

  • TOK. 14 days to go. Exams, NYC Marathon Lottery, 20 mile run.

    It has been another one of those super-eventful weeks.

    Exams

    Finally! I sat and wrote them (again). I came out and felt better than the last time. I don’t really think that is a valid indication of passing. I will find out if those feelings correlate once I see my marks on the 7th of March.

    In more ways than one, exams are like marathons. The months of studying are like months of training. This requires a level of discipline and not just reading but actually also understanding. For me, it takes me a while to understand a lot of things. I read but then more often than not, I have to re-read it as I didn’t really understand it the first time. I’m a lot better when things are hands on.

    During the build-up to the exams, I always feel that anything I do is not enough; there is always more I need to do. At some point though, my time is up and I know what I know. Also, for this exam, training for the Tokyo was my distraction from revision. And revision was my relaxation from the training. Let’s just hope that they both have worked synergistically.

    Post-exam treat

    So exam results… 7th of March 2025.

    New York Marathon Lottery

    As part of this little quest of mine, I’ve been signing up to the NYC Marathon Lottery every year for the past 4 years. No luck so far. And I am not fast enough for a guaranteed entry and no long living in NY to be signing up to the 9+1 programme.

    The lottery opened the day before the exam. I was revising in the hotel room. With the time difference, it opened at 1700 BST. Initially, I said I was going to sign up after the exam as a reward. BUT I didn’t. I went on the virtual queue and revised until it was my turn.

    11th to 25th of February 2025

    So lottery results… 5th of March 2025.

    20 Mile Run

    Last long run before the Tokyo Marathon – which is in 2 weeks’ time! I was going to do 21 but then I started getting tired and getting conscious that David was left with the kids. I was okay but towards the end, I was hitting 11-minute miles.

    Out by 630 to catch some rays.
    Freezing in 2 degrees Celcius!

    That was the last of it. I managed a 40-mile week. Now if I can taper correctly for the next 2 weeks. I may attempt one more 13 mile run next weekend.

    So marathon results… 2nd of March 2025.